Photo: Courtesy of Vibe
Interview: Courtesy of the One and only Necole Bitchie.com
"It is no secret that the Black community has a tendency to embrace homophobic precepts. We teach our little boys to be tough, not to cry and that any sign of weakness or emotion makes them look soft or alludes to them being gay. The last thing a Black man wants to be in our society is gay. So, when Phillip Hudson decided to attend Morehouse College, a traditionally Black, male school, he hoped that his fellow “brothas” would help mold him into a man his parents would be proud of. Phillip is a 20-year-old gay man. What Phillip did not know is the harassment he and his four friends, who were also gay, were going to experience daily on campus; not only from other students, but from the administration as well. Phillip and his friends, who were nicknamed “The Plastics” (a group of popular teenage females from the movie Mean Girls) by other Morehouse students, have become the voice of the victims of gay bashing at Morehouse University. They speak for those who may be too ashamed to embrace themselves and be openly gay Black men. Phillip and his friends are brave homosexual students, who are willing to share not only their triumphs, but the tragedies and constant harassment they encountered while attending Morehouse University.
BitchieLife: You attended Morehouse University. This is an all-male school. It is also an HBCU. How long did you attend Morehouse?
Phillip Hudson: I went to Morehouse for two years.
BitchieLife: During your time there you were harassed regularly. Why were you harassed and when did it first begin?
Phillip: I was harassed for being an openly gay male. The harassment kind of began during the first few days of me being there. I pretty much decided on Morehouse because I wanted to get experience in being more masculine. I thought since it was an all-male school, it would give me insight on how to be more masculine. The first day I was there, I was overwhelmed with stares. I was called “fag.” People were laughing at me. Then, there were some days that weren’t as bad. At the dorms, everyone respected me for who I was. Outside the dorms, that is where people were different with me. I would sometimes wait on my friends to come with me to the cafeteria, just so I could have some support. I would have loved to have gone to more activities on campus but we were not welcomed. Some days, I did not want to go to class. Eventually, as time goes by you become numb to it.
BitchieLife: Why did you feel the need to be more masculine at that point in your life?
Phillip: I grew up in church, so I was not allowed to be gay or even have homosexual thoughts. At the time, my dad and I had a lot of conflicts. I really wanted to have a relationship with my father. To some degree, it was for approval. However, once I did get in, he still had negative things to say. He still didn’t approve, but I figured that since I put in all the time and effort toward getting in, then I might as well stay.
BitchieLife: When you went there, you immediately started experiencing harassment. What kind of things were happening?
Phillip: Bullying. They put an article in the Morehouse newspaper talking negatively about me. They made really mean and hurtful comments. People would throw things at me while I was walking on Brown Street. There were a couple of times where I had to get in people’s faces and tell them, “I don’t know you. I stay to myself. Why won’t you leave me alone?” It was at the extent that the first time I walked into the cafeteria at Morehouse, everybody dropped their spoons and all eyes were on me. I was thinking to myself, “I look like a boy. I don’t look like a girl. What is the problem?” But, I am different. I’m tall, I had twists in my hair, I had a little bit of makeup on, but I was dressed like a boy. I had on jeans and a T-shirt, yet they stared. That is when I came to the realization that no matter how I dressed, they were going to stare and have something to say. So, I figured I might as well be who I am.
BitchieLife: You were dressed like a boy and they still stared at you. Do you think it was because they were sizing you up and in their minds could still tell that you were gay?
Phillip: I think that was it. I think people looked at me like, “Oh my God. He is so gay.” I think that if people had stopped and took the time to embrace me and what I was going through, it would have been a lot easier for me.
BitchieLife: You also had problems with the administration at Morehouse as well?
Phillip: Some of the administration would stare at me funny, cause problems for me and make comments to me. Some of the administration did reach out to me. People like Dr. Watts and Ms. Jackson in the financial aid office. Some people did try to make sure I was comfortable. The chief of police, when I first got there, brought me to his office. He took a picture of me and told everyone to make sure I was protected at all times. So, there were some people who looked out for my safety and accepted me for who I was. Don’t get me wrong; there were some brothas there who did not have a problem with my sexuality or harass me in any way. Some of the heterosexual men there did respect me for who I was. I just never felt as embraced as I should have, as a whole.
BitchieLife: There was also another situation with the administration and the dress code there. Morehouse has a strict dress code, specifically when it comes to cross dressing or what they consider to be cross dressing.
Phillip: Morehouse had a proper attire policy, not a dress code. It included no sagging of the pants, no du-rags, no baggy clothes and no female clothing. I love big bags. I always loved big bags. I don’t carry book bags, but I do carry the laptop-type bags. I have always been into fashion. Me wearing a big Marc Jacobs coat or a Gucci bag is not relevant to them. It is fashion. I would hear comments like, “You can’t come into my classroom like that because that bag looks like a purse.” Or, “You can’t wear that coat because it looks like female fashion.” A big part of the proper attire policy was geared around homosexuals and the way they dress. It was less focused on guys sagging their pants and all that other stuff.
BitchieLife: Morehouse does have a ban on cross dressing.
Phillip: Cross dressing to me … I mean, what is cross dressing? People do not know the definition of cross dressing and need to get educated on what it means. Cross dressing is the same as a drag queen. Cross dressing is not when people wear clothes that are for men and women. Some clothes are androgynous.
BitchieLife: Did you ever try to speak to anyone about the harassment you experienced there or report it to someone?
Phillip: Well, I do not know every person that ever harassed me. I don’t know every student there either. Even the closet gays would make comments about how we should behave. You don’t see them at school acting like how they do at the club. So, I went to administration a couple times, but nothing major was really done. It was never about a particular person who harassed me. It was about who harassed me as a whole. The moral fiber. This has been going on for the past two and a half years.
BitchieLife: Morehouse had the first gay pride event earlier this year. What were your thoughts about that in contrast to what you were experiencing?
Phillip: Spelman has always had a gay pride week but Morehouse recently got approached to have one. We had Internet blogger and radio personality B. Scott there. He came to the school in a pair or pumps and a leotard. He sat on the stage with his hair pinned, wearing his designer pumps on the prestigious stage of Morehouse, where Dr. King also spoke. He sat there and talked about androgyny, gays and transgenders at that school. He broke some barriers about the dress code at Morehouse.
BitchieLife: What was the reaction of the students there?
Phillip: Some loved him. However, the tennis team and the football team were not allowed to attend. They were told, if they did, they would get kicked off the team. That was a whole legal thing. The members were threatened that if they were a part of anything like that, they would get kicked off their academic scholarships. People don’t even talk about that, but it was that.
BitchieLife: Wow! Tell me about the gay Morehouse students that were kidnapped.
Phillip: There were four gay students. They were my friends. We had just come back from church. I let them borrow my vehicle. When they went to the gas station, they were car jacked and kidnapped in my car. I was not there. It was a 16, 17 and an 18 year old. They came to the car and robbed them. They stuck my friends in the trunk. One of my friends managed to keep his cell phone in his pocket. They heard the guys saying they were going to kill them. So, my friend with the phone called 911 several times and there was no answer. Finally, they called Morehouse police, and the kidnappers were caught. When my friends got back to school, I’m thinking they were going to have a big press conference, and the media would be there. They did not. I am a publicist by trade, so I had to be the one to bring the media into it. After that, there was so much negativity on campus surrounding the incident. The four guys were referred to as the “trunk boys.” Even some in the gay community made negative comments. Comments like, “I heard the plastics got stuck in a trunk. It’s about time,” were made. Morehouse did not come together after the incident. They make a big deal about brotherhood, but there was no brotherhood shown toward my friends. When a straight guy at Morehouse gets robbed then it’s like, “Oh my God! You cool dude?” People start walking together in groups. When something happens to the gays, people start saying things like, “They should have gotten killed.” I had to defend my friends, because they were like my family. It could have happened to anyone.
BitchieLife: Sounds like Morehouse does not protect their gay community as much as they should.
Phillip: I mean, the President of Morehouse made comments about loving your brothas and being more accepting. But, it’s the same. Nothing has changed. Sometimes, I could not focus on school because people were too busy commenting negatively about me.
BitchieLife: Did some of the guys who would harass you publicly also try to date you in private?
Phillip: Plenty of times. They would inbox me on Facebook. Out in public, they would say call me a fag as I walked to class.
BitchieLife: What was the breaking point? The point where you knew you had to transfer?
Phillip: The breaking point for me was seeing that there was little progression. I was there two years. A lot of people did not even know I left. I transferred to the University of South Florida. I love it there. You are who you are there. People are more accepting.
BitchieLife: You also said that at one point, while attending Morehouse, you had suicidal thoughts.
Phillip: I once bought a bottle of Everclear and thought about driving on Route 75 until I found a cliff to go over.
BitchieLife: What stopped you from taking your own life?
Phillip: I knew I had to be here to help others. I had friends who took their own lives. I want to teach others to embrace who they are. I am now planning on going on a college tour to teach other students to embrace who they are. I applaud every celebrity that is for the cause. I just think there needs to be someone who has an emotional connection to what is happening in the lives of gays.
BitchieLife: What would you like to see happen at Morehouse?
Phillip: I would like to see more acceptances. Yes, it is an all-male school, but not all males are going to be just alike. I would like to see Morehouse give more information about what we go through daily. It is hard to focus on the academics when I can’t focus on the teacher because I’m getting talked about during class."
Side Bar ~ Now Morehouse College was the first school I applied and was accepted too.
During the Youth Leadership Conference it was my first time every arriving in Atlanta, GA and the minute I heard my hero, American film director, producer, writer, actor Shelton Jackson Lee aka Spike Lee speak about his Alma Mater I was destined to be a Morehouse Man!
However, life had a different plan for me.
A week later I was accepted to Howard University, and being a kidd who didn’t want to disappoint his parents my Pops aka Step-Dad is a Howard University Alumnus and Howard University Law School Graduate, thus, he could not contain his excitement about me being accepted.
So off to D.C. I went to follow in his footsteps.
However, lawd . . . when B’wood arrived in D.C. lookin’ lost and confused my bourgeoisie self truly realized I was a Cali kidd.
I said Metro… Oh no sirrrrr! B’wood don’t do public transportation.
Pops y'all need to send my car ASAP!
F**K that freshmen "so called rule" about stayin' on campus and not having a vehicle.
And, of course I had to have a D.C. local boy encounter . . . Bruh. . . Are you jonin’ me and calling me a bama’?
I see right now the South Central in me has to crip walk on yo ass . . . Don't let the glasses fool ya!
However, as time progressed, I became a Howard University alumnus and years later who would ever think I would now reside in Atlanta, GA.
So Mr. Phillip Hudson, I would be the first to say you are more courageous then I ever could have been.
At seventeen years old when I arrived at Morehouse I was like . . . REALLY. . . I’m standing here at a private, all-male, historically Black College.
Did I mention All-Male . . . Wait, bruh did you really just walk way across campus to introduce yourself.
You a football player . . . Huh . . . Damn, lookin’ like a Supermodel and you want to be my Big Brother.
Hmmm…OOOH, Okay if you say so!
Hold Up… Me being naïve. . . Bruh, I have one Ques?
Do the 2 feet rule not apply in Georgia, because your standing mighty damn close to me.
I’m just sayin’...
Yung' Money, is Spellman College literally that close?
Damn . . . The women are phyne as hell … Whoa, Black sho nuff' is Beautiful!
Okay, one more ques, bruh?
Do you have tourette syndrome or is their somethin’ in your eye… Because, if you wink at me one mo’ gin it’s going to be a problem!
So, yeah as you can see I was not comfortable in my skin at all at the time.
But you Mr. Hudson walked on the campus as an openly gay male… Like . . . AND WHAT?
I'm so sorry your experience did not have a happy ending!
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