Depends Anyone... I'm Leakin!
Monday, June 29, 2009
Tasteless Evening
Debra Lee ~ Ms. Harvard Law School graduate, President and Chief Operating Officer of BET.
WHAT IN THE HELL?
Did you really approve this year’s 2009 BET AWARDS?
Puhleeze tell me you didn’t. It was a tad bit disheveled and somewhat embarrassing at times.
Let’s just fast forward past the pre-show and get to the Nitty-Gritty!
Hmmm, Jamie Foxx. . . . .never, I repeat never, host another BET Award Show ever! Forever, ever! He was just all over the place, missing his queue, just doing too much. I’m so pissed with him, I have to use his govern’ment name! Eric Marlon Bishop, damn! Your commercials were funnier than your damn live comedic jokes. And, why your MJ outfits looked a cheap mess. I was expecting so much more!
Where is Mo’Nique?
Can we say Next!
Soulja Boy Tell’ Em. No negro you tell me, what in the hell were you doing? And, why did you jump out of a bed. Ummm, can we hire at least one background dancer? And, literally are we strippin’? Boy, you 90 Ibs, maybe soakin’ wet, pull up your damn pants. Wait, I think he did have a ba donka donk. I just had a visual. I digress . . . I almost got sidetracked.
Can we say Next!
Ciara ~ how many times I have to tell you? G’rl you’re a performer/dancer. Know body want to hear you sing no ballets. Out of all the damn days to showcase your talent, when you could have done a great tribute to MJ with a dance medley, you sit your ass on a stool next to Mr. Piano Man! Heifer, you barely got thru that song. And even Mr. Piano Man was lookin’ like, G’rl if you don’t get thru this damn song, because you’re killin’ me!
Seriously Next!
New Edition, Guy, BBD, Keith Sweat, Tevin Campbell ~ okay, please let me whoop Aaron Hall ass. This brotha danced so hard, and could barely hold a note, because he couldn’t breathe. I literally thought they were going to start playin’ Destiny’s Child – Lose My Breath as he walked off the stage. Simmer down shorty, you tried way too hard! OMG he sounded a hott mess! WHY Aaron, WHY!
New Edition/ BBD ~ Go-On Ralph Tresvant, Ronnie DeVoe, Ricky Bell, Michael Bivins, and Bobby Brown I will get to you later! They still got it! They just were cutting a rug. But, damn-it why somebody didn’t put Bobby on Slim-Fast? He know he can’t be eating a Whopper, beef patty, mayonnaise, lettuce, tomato, pickles, ketchup, sliced onion, cheese, on a sesame seed bun right before his performance! But, he was still keepin’ up!
Keith Sweat ~ now, we all know Keith can’t sing, but, is it me or does he still get dem drawls’. Damn, Keith you still make us break a Sweat!
Tevin Campbell ~ babe, Stop the MUTHA FREAKIN Press. Where did they find Tev-E-Tev? I thought my poor babe was a crack head. No seriously, it’s not a game. But, OMG tell LaShonda Jenkins, she worked magic on you Cover Girl look, or maybe that was Queen Latifah Black is Beautiful Queen Collection. He looked so good! Not to mention Tevin can still sang. You GO BOY!
Mary Mary ~ I so love ya’ll, but, really though Tina Campbell is a ham sandwhich away. No like really she’s pass Thicka than Snicka. But, we gonna say that’s baby weight G’rl, that’s all baby weight. Ummm, hmmm!
Beyoncé ~ (Don’t forget accent over the e). Why in the hell you do that damn sang? I was about to AVA Maria yo ass right off the stage. B now you know I love ya, and perhaps you didn’t have time to rehearse. But, you literally took that performance right from your concert and just said, look, I’m here take it or leave it. It just didn’t fit in with the program at all! And, fix your weave. It was lookin’ like a stringy, tangled mess! I told you to try Kinky Curly – KNOT TODAY G’rl!
Tyrese, Taraji P. Henson and Ving Rhames ~ Boy we all had a flashback of Baby Boy and that Thug Love. I mean really let’s be real Tyrese, got us all moist with his Thug Look. Then damn, Ving Rhames, just literally killed it. I was so there, until it turned into a ghetto mess!
Tameka “Tiny” Cottle ~ aka T.I. wife aka ex- Xscape group member. Really, Tiny, no really. If that’s ATL’s Finest, STOP THE MUTHA FREAKIN PRESS!
Keisha Cole and Monica ~ OMG I must was on a Merry-Go-Round, because I’m still dizzy from them spinning. And question is that a Monica song or Keisha Cole. Clearly, Monica took the stage like it was her comeback single! And, was Keisha pink bustier and tribute to Wonderful Women or wait Keri Hilson did that!
Keri Hilson ~ WHY IN THE HELL YOU SANGIN’ A CAPPELLA. Puhleeze G’rl, you sing only over yo track. That is the only time you allowed to sang. Ya hear whatta say!
Now the Man of the evening was clearly Néyo. OMG, he sounded outstanding. He seemed like the only performer who took the show seriously. I really don’t think many people can sing a MJ song and sound decent, but, he blew me away.
Maxwell, okay, boo. . .Are you our male Sade. You come back out of hiatus, and sound awesome and looked so good. It’s your time!
Trey Songz, Johnny Gill, Tyrese ~ Trey. . . Mercy Me, Trey. . . enuff said! Johnny Gill, I seriously thought it was all about you, and then Tyrese can out of know where. I almost forgot Tyrese can sing, but, then he stole the show! They did pretty good!
Now, I'm super pissed with Chris Brown. This really should have been his time to shine, and why Usher wasn’t there? Everything Usher does is extrapolated from MJ. And, why Diana Ross didn’t give a tribute? It just seemed thrown together at the last minute. If your not going to do it right, then don’t do it at all. They could of had a complete MJ Tribute not tied in to the BET Awards.
Lastly, Janet Jackson surprised us all. I was hurting for her. And, Joe Jackson didn’t know whether to be happy or sad!
Side Bar ~ was it me or did Don Cornelius literally speak like one word every twelve minutes. OMG, why someone didn’t help him with his mic. But, he looked good. And, am I sleeping on rapper Drake.
And we just can’t say enough about Alicia Keys and Wyclef Jean. Their heart is so sincere! Good job A & W!
Friday, June 26, 2009
I Want You Back!
June 25, 2009 was the day we lost a singer, songwriter, record producer, arranger, dancer, choreographer, actor, author, businessman, financier, and philanthropist.
All these things equate one person ~ “The King of Pop ~ Michael Joseph Jackson”.
Do to the fact that I am so devastated, clearly I had to take bereavement leave. My heart truly is overwhelmed with sadness.
Growing up, my grandmother Ms. Cruz would often say that good and bad things happen in threes. Usually I would say Uhh, huh and chalk it up as silly superstition. However, with the recent passing of Ed McMahon on June 23, 2009, Farrah Fawcett on June 25, 2009 and now Michael Jackson maybe my grandmother was right.
Throughout the years we have talked about Michael Jackson and his eccentric ways. Yet, somehow we feel like we have lost a family member. He has made an impact on multiple generations and in my opinion is our male Princess Diana. He truly is our Ambassador known around the world. We were all sadden, and mourned as we watched the funeral of Princess Diana; however, the world hasn’t seen nothing yet. Michael Jackson funeral will literally stop all normal schedule programming and freeze frame our life, if only for a moment.
Despite his physical transformations throughout the years, and multitude of child sexual abuse accusations I secretly was routing for MJ to pull thru, and rise to the occasion. I kept praying that perhaps he was just misunderstood.
I think we all get confused with MJ the artist, yet, always yearning to know MJ the person. Humph, I guess we will never know!
I LOVE YOU MJ!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
OOH My Nappy Hair!
Hey U . . . Yeah, U . . .
Babe, I got a secret to tell. Ummmm, Hmmm.
Just call me Lipton, because boo I got the T!
You have to try the new product of the year! Trust me, it’s a
B! Xclusive.
Miss Jessie’s Créme De La Curl (Shampoo)
Miss Jessie’s Créme De La Créme (Conditioner)
Kinky Curly ~ Knot Today (Leave-In Conditioner)
Babe, when I tell you my Curls for the G’rls and Waves for the Babes, was bangin’. I almost caught myself doing the white G’rl flip. You know how they do! Tossin their hair every two seconds.
I’m telling you ya’ll Denzel ain’t got nothing on me! Okay, maybe a few millions, but, that’s it. Regardless, I’m still lookin’ OOH SO FINE, I DAMN NEAR BLEW MY MIND!
I love products that are specifically made for our hair. So if your ever in the bourgeoise side of town, know as Buckhead ~ Atlanta, GA please visit Urbanbella ~ The Curly, Kinky, Wavy Hair Apothecary at 141 W. Wieuca Rd., Suite 202A, Atlanta, GA 30342. (404) 255-5022. Now this place is tucked away in a lil nook and cranny. So keep this on the hush!
You can also order online and check out their other Urbanbella Product Line by visiting www.urbanbella.net.
Now warning Ladies and Gents your new found swagger will attract dem Hotties, just remember to always B! Xclusive!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Unprecendented D.C. Subway Tragedy
B~wood woke up perplexed and still in awe over the train collision that occurred in Northeast Washington, D.C. on June 22, 2009.
As I tuned-in and listen to the morning news, the death toll seemed to rise from the previous day climbing to a totally of 9 people.
Being a D.C. resident for many years, the RED Line was my imaginary Lexus (GS luxury sedan) that rode me to my favorite spots like Silver Spring, White Flint, Galley Place-Chinatown, and the infamous DuPont Circle. Never would have fathom that D.C. metro could get into an accident. I guess I was naïve.
As I tried to sleep last night, the voice of the computerized Metro Train kept saying. . . Doors Closing . . . Next Stop Fort Totten Station . . . Doors will be opening on the left.
Never did those 9 people realize that those doors closing would symbolize closure on their life.
As you look at the photos, you think it perhaps is a Hollywood Movie production until reality sets in as you see the fireman assisting a passenger walking away limping from the wreckage.
My mother always says I take life for granted. But, I want to tell her, I wish I was granted the opportunity to know how to enjoy life!
The Best Ever ~ That's The Argu-a-ment?
Baby g’rl you already know. . .
RING THE ALARM . . .
RING THE MUTHA FREAKIN’ ALARM . . .
It’s count down people. You have 7 days before Beyoncé (don’t forget accent over the e) Giselle Knowles arrives in Atlanta, GA Philips Arena.
It’s an Extravaganza!
Let me tell ya. A kidd has been getting his workout on. My calisthenics got a brutha lookin' toned up. Not to mention my jumping jacks, sit-ups, crunches, push-ups, squats, dips, calf-raises. So I’m, ready to break-it down!
Whoa, last B concert my gluteus maximus was no good. That rump/junk in the truck was out of commission for two weeks. NO MA’AM. Not this time. This ass is ready!
I literally will become the third back-up dancer, it’s a B! Xclusive. No really, it’s not a game.
That’s until security tote my ass right off the stage.
So yeah, last night I called B!
I said Hey G’rl. . . You Ready? Uh-huh. . . No really, the Kids are ready. . . Uh-huh. Okay, don’t play. . . Boy B is always ready. Oh, yeah I forgot g’rl you are the Queen.
Let’s Go Get’ EM!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
